Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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