She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize