apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
