It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
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