Pappa wants mamma naked
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
