is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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