road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Randomize
