He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Randomize
