I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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