I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
not ubering you a puppy
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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