Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
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