considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
