Cold hands, warm shart.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
she smelled like a LAN party
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize