who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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