That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
