Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
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