My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
