We need to rekindle our bromance
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
