Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
