No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
