I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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