I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I have aggressive nipples.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize
