Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
