Non-Jews are for practice
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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