I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Randomize
