like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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