They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
