There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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