at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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