I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
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