i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
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