remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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