i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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