I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize