Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i think i have two assholes
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
