you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I have surprise drugs for everyone
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
