So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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