Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Pants are for mortals
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
