hotel room ftw
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
