the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize