Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(303): View more from Colorado

My friends, they love my intelligence

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(586): View more from Michigan

Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?

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(540): View more from Virginia

i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!

(804): View more from Virginia

a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.

(804): View more from Virginia

That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...

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(712): View more from Iowa

They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.

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(207): View more from Maine

so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.

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(903): View more from Texas

I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule

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