I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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