Dude! wtf happend last nite? I woke up with 2 black eyes and a head ache
You stepped off the curb and face planted the road...twice
Why didnt you hold me up....and why a second time?
I helped you up but figured it was wayy funnier to watch you fall again then lose my buzz....
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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