EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
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