If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
