And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
This is the high leading the old right now
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
