i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
The air taste purple.
Randomize
