You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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