fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
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