he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
